As we looped around the pool at Southern Hills Golf Club, the Red Baron dropped me at the service entrance. Not on purpose, we were actually lost. The directions given by a security guard at the front gate were sketchy at best…

A true friend never hesitates to create a diversion.   *Note to self: Fancy party shoes plus polished tiled floor equals “Slip and Slide.”   *Scientific fact: Time it takes from the initial ankle twist until full floor contact: two seconds. Time…

A thin stream of fractured daylight split through the amber sheer and woke me. I cracked one eye and searched for something familiar. I asked myself two pressing questions:  Where am I and which way to the bathroom?   A heavy baroque…

Entomologists in a highly coveted PHD program discovered pheromones to repel beetles from weak trees. (Pine beetle be gone forever.) Normally the tiny bugs send out a “feel good” pheromone to attract other beetles. The synthetic anti-pheromone, however, sends out an opposite…

A ton equals 2000 lbs.   *Note to self:  When  you tell someone they “weigh a ton” chose the recipient carefully.   *PC  uses for ton:  Describing airplanes, sports cars, linebackers, chocolate, muscle, and Parisian platforms.    *On a date:  Wow, you’re…

“When in doubt cowboy out, make a space for you’re face.”   *Note to self:  Who says participating in high school sports can’t teach life skills?   *Other words of wisdom from my gymnastics coach:  perseverance always prevails, fear isn’t real, and…

I was standing next to the Wheel of Fortune slots when my friend walked up with a hunky man in tow. (think Russell Crowe in “Gladiator”)    “Hey,” she said and hugged me. Her sidekick waited patiently.    After a few minutes…

Many friends, acquaintances really Different places, short visits Everything is familiar, but still, alone. Competent mostly, but aging quickly, forgetful. Still possessing that special something, coveted by so many and realized by few. The ultimate expert. Well-versed in the ways of the…

Never bite into anything that is labeled time-release. Especially before a business dinner.   *Note to self: It takes less than ten minutes for the human body to flush beet red. An extra five to break out in hives.   *Color me…

In the middle of a seven-by-seven leg set, my work out guru eyed my trembling quads and said, “You need to start taking Creatine.”   “What?” I exhaled and let the steel plates clang. Anytime Smiley (Yes, his name is actually Smiley….